Lo, ye content, how have I forsaken thee?

Last Tuesday, I made my way to the infamous Temptation Zone, hoping to procure a copy of the long anticipated F-Zero GX. Alas, the sales people told me it wouldn't be in until Thursday, despite the fact that the published release date was supposedly August 25th. Oh well. 2 more days, no biggie.

Did various bits of html work last week. Nothing terribly exciting or challenging, but hey, it's a little cash.

On Thursday evening, scottgalvin.com had once again managed to score a spot house sitting in the crazy suburbian yuppie zone (the one he has been known to occupy during holidays when the normal residents go out of town), and invited me over to eat. (Apparently, he had tried to also invite a few other people, but none of them materialized.)

We made a grocery run, he grilled some steak, and I put together a quick version of my bean dip. (scottgalvin.com, wishing to learn the secret of the super patented bean dip, observed the process. I told it's really quite simple. You just keep adding stuff until it tastes right.)

We watched the Wachowski classic, Bound, followed by Total Recall. (Complete with obligatory wise cracks about the would-be future governer of California.)

After that (around midnight?), scottgalvin.com needed to go pick up his girlfriend, so I split and returned home.

On Friday, after completing the couple hours of work that needed to be done, I returned to the Temptation Zone. This time, I was successful in my attempt to acquire the coveted box containing a disc 8 centimeters in diameter. I zoomed home, popped it into the cube, and racing bliss was mine.

F-Zero. How can the wonder of this recurring phenomenon be explained to anyone who has not experienced it in one of its mighty incarnations? [Here is where Bitscape reveals his true Nintendo fanboy colors.] It is not merely a racing game. It is the closest thing to a pure adrenaline rush possible using CRT technology; crack cocaine administered directly into the brain via the ocular pathway. Speed on speed.

This latest version does not disappoint. It features beautifully designed courses, all the classic characters with their corresponding vehicles, and most importantly, insanely freaky fast speed!

In keeping with N-64 tradition, speed boosts -- available after the first lap -- draw their energy from the car's health. I like this approach better than the SNES/GBA rules, which doled out a fixed number of boosts after each lap. It makes for much more interesting races, allowing crazy lunatics like me to engage in risky behavior. Burst away all your power, launching into 1st place, and then get blown away with the slightest bump against another vehicle or the guard rails on the corner. Now that's what I call fun!

Generally speaking, I personally prefer to drive the heavier vehicles. Maybe it's my racing style, but I seem to do better with them. Heavy vehicles with reasonably good cornering ability, and set on a fairly high max speed. Acceleration and boost efficiency be damned.

Let the other idiots waste the first lap all trying to beat each other zooming to the front, while my vehicle lags behind. Then, one by one, I gradually overtake them all. Since I'm lugging a big ole hunk of metal, their attempts to knock me off balance are woefully pathetic, and more likely to do them in. I am the unstoppable machine, faster and faster, gunning to the front. 2nd lap, boosts come in. Use them judiciously. Final lap, go all out. Boost 'em all to hell. One more corner to round before I take the 1st place title, but No. 2 is right on my tail. I boost boost boost, cram the corner, and...

BOOM, off the course. Retire.

Doh. So much for that attempt.

Retry.

And again.

God, I love this game.

In addition to all the known and loved standard features, this one includes story mode, which includes all sorts of wacky scenarios you have to open up using tickets acquired from Grand Prix winnings. Also, there's a custom machine editor, which is a little on the crazy side.

Putting custom machines together using parts from the shop? That's cool from a customization standpoint. Being able to specify the RGB color value of each part that's added to a vehicle? Getting nuttier. Selecting from a whole ton of predefined bitmap images which can be stamped anywhere on the vehicle at any orientation? That's bordering on the outright loony. But including an entire freakin paint program in the game so players can draw their own bitmaps to stamp on their custom cars?

Some people simply have WAY too much time on their hands. [/me looks around. Nope, nobody like that around here today.]

Ahem. There are three Cups in the Grand Prix. The Ruby Cup (easiest courses), The Sapphire Cup (moderate courses), and The Emerald Cup (difficult courses). Each cup has 5 courses. With me so far?

There are also 3 classes. The class determines how difficult the computer AI racers are. Novice (based on experience with previous F-Zero games, I didn't even bother trying this one; it's always way too easy), Standard (fun when just learning how to get around), and Expert (this is where it's at).

Having won both the Ruby and Sapphire Cups in Expert Class ("won" being defined as ranking at the top after the combined point totals from all 5 courses are added together), today I finally managed to win the Emerald Cup, Standard class. This opened up the heretofore unseen Diamond Cup! (Not really that huge of a surprise, since every F-Zero ever known to exist has featured a hidden cup that is only revealed after winning all the normal ones, but still fun.)

If I am to extrapolate, I would also guess that after I win the Emerald Cup (and possible the Diamond?) on Expert Class, the Master Class will appear. And THAT is where the REAL insanely nutty challenge is.

Well, so far I haven't even been able to get past the 2nd Course of the Diamond Cup in Standard Class. Sand Ocean, with all the dropoffs and almost no safety rails at all. But I will. It's just a matter of time and practice.

But now, I am babbling. New topic.

On Saturday morning, I got inspired, and decided to make yet another batch of delicious bean dip. Having procured a sufficient quantity of habaneros, jalepenos, garlic, cheese, and pintos (ingredient quantities in the order listed -- haha, yeah right -- but to hear my mom talk, you'd think it was that way), I created an industrial supply of the patented substance.

I seasoned it to taste, and said, "It is good." But my mom said, "It's way too spicy."

And behold, it was good.

Today (Monday), Jaeger invited me over to taste donuts at the Louisville Enclave (or whatever it's going to be called). Since I had copious quantities on hand, I brought along some of my bean dip to share.

I arrived in time for supper. Kiesa had prepared enchiladas and rice in addition to the donuts, and we ate. The donuts were homemade. I don't believe I have ever eaten homemade donuts prior to this day. Freshly glazed, they were quite delicious.

I examined Jaeger's newly acquired home theater audio device. After listening to it for about 2 seconds, I concluded that the speakers were out of phase. Since the speaker wires had no marking to indicate polarity, I unplugged one of them at random and reversed it, which seemed to fix things. (I would be deeply worried if it didn't.)

Since the Scifi channel was running a marathon, we watched an episode of Stargate: SG1. Since no one in the room was a fan, or even a regular viewer, we had no idea what was going on with regard to the larger plot arc elements referenced by characters, but the episode story was self-contained enough to be sufficiently entertaining.

Jaeger loaned me a batch of cds containing the first 2 seasons of Alias, which I suspect will prove sufficiently entertaining. (I've only seen the first 2 or 3 episodes I downloaded from Humblik last March, which were relatively cool, although they didn't blow me away. But I don't think I saw enough to make an informed opinion. There are a sufficient number of known people saying it gets really really super awesome that I am inclined to watch some more episodes before drawing conclusions.)

In other tv news, I am aware that not one, but TWO dvd sets are coming out tomorrow, which rate from the "high" to the "very high" priority levels on my scale. I might get 1, but perhaps not both, right away. I dunno. I probably shouldn't be spending so much money on this crap, especially at my current (lack of) employment level.

Fiscal responsibility. Blah. George Bush doesn't know the meaning of the phrase. Why should I?

(Yeah, we know we are getting into bad territory when George Bush's footsteps mark the trail.)

Anyway, it's my bedtime now. Or at least it should be. Night and out.