Did another shift at the deli today. Despite attempts to the otherwise, I'm finding it harder and harder to make myself care whether I'm even doing a good job there anymore. I merely go through the motions as my sentence nears its probable end. I just want it to be over, and the next phase of my career evolution to begin.

I almost find myself wishing that I had held hard to my two week notice, just so that I could be done with that, solid. I'm fairly certain that I'll be able to at least do a passable job at the newspaper gig; maybe even make a mint at it. (Compared to my deli pay, that is.) But the wiser half of my brain knows that it's good to hold onto it just a longer, just in case... Just in case.

Besides, it does give them a little longer before they have to find my replacement. (If a certain other content vulture is truly desperate enough to follow in my footsteps, I would be happy to recommend him to the manager. In a strange way, it would amusing if another member of the Content Solutions circle were to succeed me in the same venue. Comparing notes, content-wise, could be the essence of hilarity. Or maybe I exaggerate.)

It does seem to me that over the past few days, they have eased up on the rigorous nightly inspection walks. I'm not even sure if they did one at all tonight. I secretly wonder whether this apparent change had anything to do with what I said to the manager about my (partial) reasons for seeking work elsewhere. Could word have been passed along, resulting in key decision maker(s) getting a clue that these nightly hassling sessions were having a nasty adverse effect on morale? It seems at least remotely possible.

(I know I was far from the only person who was annoyed by it. But I believe that I was the only person motivated, crazy, or just plain lucky enough to have another employment alternative to pursue at the moment.)

Then again, it's also possible that this change had nothing to do with me or anyone else's opinion on the matter. It could merely be the end of yet another management fad, going away with the same inexplicable lack of perceptible logic with which it appeared. No context, no reason. Sometimes things just happen.

Or maybe it hasn't really gone away at all. Maybe it's just on brief hiatus for a few days. One can never tell for sure.

(Actually, if my full opinion is to be stated, I think the inspections might actually be a decent idea, IF they hired enough people and budgeted enough hours to make it realisticly possible to meet all the requirements on busy nights. But the way it's been, giving the people who were working their asses off bad marks because some stuff wasn't done makes it a counterproductive exercise in futility. That's the essence of what I said to my manager a couple weeks ago after giving notice, even though I know she doesn't make the policy decisions on these matters.)

Anyway... As I said, it has become hard for me to really care at this point. Working on the assumption that I'll be gone very soon, I just.... want it to be done. As I cleaned tonight, I found myself mentally rehearsing how I'll do my newspaper pitches. Mentally, I've already switched over.

It could also be that I'm just feeling generally worn out, due to working full time at the deli at the same time I interviewed, trained, and went to meetings at my new job during the past few days. I know I'm tired right now. I originally wasn't even going to come over here tonight, but... the urge to see Argo overwhelmed my desire for immediate sleep.

On that note, I'll be signing off.

Finally, here's a fun article about how to live if you think you might already be in The Matrix (or the holodeck). Grabbed right from the front page of slashdot, so many have probably already gotten wind of it. But that's all I have energy to hunt down tonight, and I thought it was a fun piece. A philosophy to live by. Or something like that.