You and me baby
ain't nothin but mammals
so let's do it like they do
on the discovery channel

You and me baby
ain't nothin but mammals
so let's do it like they do
on the discovery channel

You and me baby
ain't nothin but mammals
so let's do it like they do
on the discovery channel

Oh, you mean I'm actually supposed to be coming up with something original to say? Sorry. That song was just on the radio while I was driving home from work, and it just sort of got stuck in my head. Ya know how it goes. Catchy little tune. Sometimes, those mindless dance numbers just have a way of... penetrating the skull. Hmmmm.

The primary mission of this web page -- as it has always been, and always will be (so saith The Party) -- is to continue to distract, and thereby subvert, every visitor who manages to find and return to this obscure little place. If you are at work, and your productivity is taking a dive as you read through the multi-part weekend adventure reports, I consider my work a success. If you are a student, and can't seem to be getting any homework done because, no matter how hard you try to resist, you just keep returning to this url, then every keystroke I have laboriously typed has not been in vain. If you surfing from home, and reading this instead of watching whatever mediocre sitcom or crappy Jesus movie happens to be on, then it is truly a cause for celebration!

I need some more music. There we go.

I think I'll refrain from mentioning exactly what I'm listening to. Let's just say it's.... old. After starting the cd, I thought about going on to reference something else that I'm not listening to at all right now, but that just seems silly. Ok, fine, I will name the artist. But just the artist. Not the song, or the album. Def Leppard. There. Happy?

Didn't think so. lol.

Ok, here's a question for the audience. It involves my third New Year's resolution. For those who don't remember or haven't been here long enough to know, it contained the words, "This year, I shall find a girlfriend." (Uh oh. battlestations!) Hmmm... I'm almost hesitant to write this, for fear it will be taken the wrong way by some readers. Aw well. Gotta follow the muses, even if they do sometimes take the form of strippers blowing bubblegum. (Yes, that was meant as a Kevin Smith reference, and yes, it might also foreshadow in some subtle way what is to come.) This actually involves a theory I've harbored for quite a while. Months, years even. Honest.

Here's the question: where the fsck can a guy around here go to find some good ex-Catholics of the female variety? Ok, that may sound like a joke, but it ain't! Serious. After many long years of tedious study and careful research, my laboratories have concluded that the best women in the world have all, inevitably, been raised Catholic. Inevitably. (Ok, maybe a Methodist or two here and there, but they seem to be more the exception than the rule.)

Case in point: The artist formerly... er.. that's currently... known as Madonna. Revolutionized the music scene in the 80s. Over the years, has successfully dabbled in a multitude of musical genres, and graced the silver screen on many occassions. Aw hell, I once wrote a whole web page about her. Need I really go on? Raised Catholic

.

Case in point: Alanis Morissette. Yeah, more good music. And an attitude to match. Puts on a damn good show. I know first hand. Raised Catholic.

Case in point: Courtney Love. Ok, I know some are going to shake their heads at this one. But besides making good music, she's gone through a lot and come out on top. That's good in my book. Raised Catholic.

Case in point: Lucy Lawless. Xena. Need I say more? Raised Catholic.

Case in point: ... Nah, actually we'll stop there. I think the point has been made. (If you consider a few isolated, totally non-scientific anecdotal examples convincing. lol.)

So, the question again: where the fsck can a guy around here go to find some good ex-Catholics of the female variety? I don't know what it is, but there must be something about it. Some magic injection they stick in 'em at that age. I don't know what causes it, I just observe and spot patterns. And I see a pattern here: The ex-Catholics basicly rock.

I need to figure out where they all hang out, so I can go there. :) If any readers would care to comment (or probably flame me) about this phenomenon, I'd like to hear it, especially if it contains an answer to my question. Not that a definitive answer really exists. lol.

And on to ever-more irrelevant content...

(And no, busloads of school children who crowd into Quiznos restaurants do not count. I'm talking about ex-Catholics in the same age range as myself.)

Oh let's see... what else might be entertaining. Hmmmm... current events. Here's one: Who wants Microsoft to be eviscerated by the US government? Frankly, at this point, I really don't even care. I mean, being in the tech industry, a programmer, computer ethnusiast, and all, I guess I'm supposed to have an opinion about it. But really, the whole case just bores me these days.

I mean, what the fsck is it going to matter in my life one way or the other? Whether they get split up or not, I'll still avoid their shitty products whenever possible. Microsoft or no Microsoft, I'll continue to live my life. For all I care, the entire Redmond campus could get sucked into an inter-dimensional spacial anomaly, and I would barely notice, except for the occasional news report which happens to trickle my way.

Even if the judge does break Microsoft up, those who are stuck with Windows will still be stuck with Windows. Here's a real newsflash: An order from Washington will not help a single bit in the battle against mass stupidity. Because that's really what Microsoft is about. That's what fuels them. Consumer ignorance. Well, that, and negligence by competitors. As long as these things exist, the heart of the problem will still remain. Judge Jackson can't do a thing about that.

Ok, that's enough of that little rant. I think I'll go back and wander the kitchen, then see if Voyager is on tonight. It should be, but you never know these days...