These are products I feel are worth having. The makers of these products have given me no money, nor have they given me any free samples or other material rewards unafforded to any other consumer. Many of them may not even be aware that their product is mentioned here.
| Product Name | Comments | Available at |
|---|---|---|
| MADONNA CDS!!! | Each one is a must-have | Everywhere! |
| Sony Discman Model D-131 |
Long battery life Skips while jogging |
Electronics Stores I bought mine at Wal Mart |
| Gravis PC Gamepad | An excellent device for use with the product below | Computer Stores |
| Doom & Doom II by id software |
It's still the best game around... until Quake comes out :) |
Software stores |
| Windows 95 Microsoft Corp |
Easy to use and an all-around great product | Just about any software store |
| Deskjet 500 Hewlett Packard |
Used it for 2.5 years and it still works perfectly | Used. No, I'm not selling mine. Newer models have superceded it. |
| Bookshelf 95 Microsoft Corp |
I use the dictionary most. It's also got a few Madonna quotes! |
Software stores. Soon to be replaced with Bookshelf 96 |
| Cinemania 96 Microsoft Corp |
THE best home database for looking up movies
I have seen. Free monthly updates are slow |
Software stores |
| PC Magazine Ziff Davis Corp |
Haven't had time to read my latest issue. Use it to keep up with the PC industry. | Where magazines are sold |
| Epic Pinball & Extreme Pinball Epic Megagames |
A fun way to waste nervous energy. Great graphics and lots of tables to choose from | Epic's web site |
| Little Caesar's Pizza | Who says a corperation that treats its employees like shit can't make a good pizza? Not I. | Louisville, CO |
| Dita | I haven't read the publication, but I trust the email message I recieved regarding it. Boy, it almost makes me want to change my "Products to Avoid" list, but I think I'll leave it the way it is at least a little bit longer for the purposes of preserving history. | send an irc or sae to DITA c/o Lisa Walters 109 Dock Road Little Thurrock Grays Essex RM17 6EY U.K |
| Murder in the First | It is an outstanding movie starring Christian Slater, Kevin Bacon, and Gary Oldman. WATCH IT! It is now my second-favorite movie. | Blockbuster Video |
| pair networks | EXCELLENT Internet web page service with EXCELLENT pricing. One warning: if you're going to use this one, you have to know what you're doing. They aren't going to make any of your web page for you, and you're going to have to manage it yourself. If you can do that, I guarantee you'll grow to love pair, as I have. | http://www.pair.com |
| KBPI | This is a radio station that listened to my insane ravings, and I listen to them. They even put a musically talented schizophrenic on the air every now and then. He takes his medications and whoops that cheetah's ass! Only us lucky people around here get to listen. The rest of you can seethe with jealousy. | Denver, Colorado |
| Fort Logan Mental Institute | They heal people. People go there to get well. They even offer Catholic and Protestant services for the religous ones among us. In fact they're so good, I think we should give them a new name, or maybe a title. Let's call Fort Logan the Ministry of Love. | Fort Logan, Colorado Oceania |
| Truth or Dare | Did I mention my second favorite movie a second ago? Well, in case you didn't know, this movie is my first choice. | Blockbuster Video, last time I checked |
I apologize for my earlier comments in early April about Lisa Walters a.k.a. "DITA". They were insulting, unjustified, nationalistic, inappropriate, rude, and based upon ignorance, or in my case, blurred thinking. I was stupid to utter those words of hatred and anger. Us Madonna fans get enough of that from others already. We don't need to be throwing insults at each other. The song "Why's it so hard" comes to mind. I'm sorry Lisa.
So, why did I do it? Well, believe it or not, I looked at the address a day after putting the ad in my page and thought, "My God! It's bogus." I hadn't been getting much sleep for days, and I'm sure that contributed to my unclear thinking. There were also some heavy conflicts going on with my parents. (Does that ever change?)
Later, some even more seemingly bizzare events occured, and my writing on other topics became even more ridiculous and hateful. Now, I look back and see that the conspiracies to hack my web page and make my passwords not get through correctly were probably really phone line problems, which have been occuring on a seemingly endless basis lately after repeated reports from US West that the phones are fixed. Hmmmm.... What was I writing about long-distance phone companies way back in February in a document entitled "My Two Cents on Internet Censorship"? Under the telecommunications reform bill, companies like US West could get into long-distance service. Now, put it together. Are you ready for Al Gore's well-hyped "Information Super-Highway!" I wonder if this is what he had in mind...
Well, I'd me writing more, but I gotta get back to the mental institution in a few hours. I'm on a visit home right now. Seriously! I've been put in a mental institution. Been there for weeks. That's why I haven't been putting anything new in here. Why, you may ask? Well, when I thought my web passwords had been hacked to hell by someone at Microsoft, found that my parents and brother were out of the house, possibly abducted by henchmen from Microsoft, and my email system still not working correctly, I literally went nuts. (For all I know, that email problem could still exist. I haven't had time to tested mail functions yet.)
After all this, what did I do? I went out and murder another man with a spoon. Not. I went out in the street, case full of cds in hand and started walking down the street. I saw some teenagers conversing on a nearby neighbor's front porch. I let out a yell, and said, "Hi! How ya doin?"
"Alright, man!" was the response.
"Keep rockin!"
I kept wandering around the neighborhood having similarly odd conversatins with teenagers. I went into a couple of local business establishments which I won't name at this time, and talked about Madonna, KBPI, and the evils of Bill Gates and Microsoft. For those who don't know, KBPI is one of the best radio stations in the area. They've been playing a lot of Alanis lately. Does that mean anything to anybody? ;)
Alright, to make a VERY long story VERY short, I was stopped by the police on several occations and told by them that I "could have" been charged with disturbing the peace for "shouting at the neighbors", as my dad put it. My public antics got more and more rediculous as the days went on. I was caught "acting wierd" in the median of a busy street at night. I was endangering myself, as the traffic on that road is fast. The speed limit is 50, but we all know about speed limits, don't we? Hmmmm... Wasn't much traffic at all in the road at that time of night. Probably more police than anyone else. Oh. I was going to make this short, wasn't I? Here we go...
I did strange, unknown things with my computer, radio and other devices in my room, opened the windows late at night and played LOUD music out them, started walking around in daylight in strange costumes, shouting, tearing my clothes off, and throwing some of them in irrigation rivers. All this in broad daylight, mind you. Oh, I also deleted my web page when I got a chance, just to see what the infamous hackers at Microsoft would do. As I said before, I'm pretty sure now that it was just heavy phone line static. Now, the phones are fixed.
Well, when I was taken, by the police, to the mental examiners, I resisted every instruction. I was, and am, seriously mentally ill. [Off topic, I know, but I wonder if those police had any relatives in Toronto, Canada. You think so? I never got a chance to ask. Maybe next time I will. Back to our subject.] It's been taking them weeks to diagnose my condition, because I was so uncooperative and "acting psychotic" while in a video-monitored seclusion cell.
After a few days of acting psychotic in seclusion with occasional food and water, I became more submissive. With enough of this type of conditioning over the coming weeks, I got better and better, although I'm still refusing my medications, which are designed to make me well. Patients have a right to do it in Colorado, and these rights are posted, as required by law, in the hospital.
I wonder if I would have legal grounds to sue them for forcefully injecting prescribed medications and literally trying to shove the pills down my throat with security guards present. Ahh, probably not. After all, I was acting psychotic in there. They had to do something about it, didn't they? They may have even had a court order for the medications, which would mean I would have no grounds whatsoever for a lawsuit. I guess I'll just have to "get well" and be discharged. Then I can REALLY get back in the web page business.
A message to Madonna: You have been an inspiration
throughout this time of great heartache, repeated
disappointment, and betrayal. I sang your songs to
myself while in seclusion. Sometimes soft, sometimes
loud. Sometimes while I was still, sometimes with
movement. The delusions I went through while in the
seclusion chamber were many. Sometimes, I believed you
to be directly responsible for my capture. Now I know
the truth. Also, I hope you have a great baby! I heard
about the pregnancy while in the institution. Actually,
I heard while still dazed shortly after
coming out of the seclusion chamber. I didn't believe
it at first,
but I didn't really know what to believe about anything
or anyone at that time, so I hope you can understand.
Since, I've come to accept reality, developed some great
friendships with a few other "mentally ill"
patients, and had some really great times. Anyway,
Congratulations. Have fun raising a child. :)
-----------------------------------------------------------
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
It's human nature it's human nature
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me it's human nature
You wouldn't let me say the words I longed to say
You didn't want to see life through my eyes
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
You tried to shove me back inside your narrow room
And silence me with bitterness and lies
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Did I say something wrong?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
I musta been crazy
Did I stay too long?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't speak my mind
What was I thinking
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
It's human nature it's human nature
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me it's human nature
You punished me for telling you my fantasies
I'm breakin' all the rules I didn't make
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
You took my words and made a trap for silly fools
You held me down and tried to make me break
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Did I say something true?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
I musta been crazy
Did I have a point of view?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about you
What was I thinking
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
It's human nature it's human nature
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me it's human nature
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Express yourself, don't repress yourself
Did I say something true?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex
I musta been crazy
Did I have a point of view?
Oops, I didn't know I couldn't talk about you
What was I thinking
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
It's human nature it's human nature
And I'm not sorry I'm not sorry
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me it's human nature
And I'm not sorry I'm not apologizing
It's human nature Would it sound better if I were a man?
And I'm not sorry You're the one with the problem
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me Why don't you just deal with it
And I'm not sorry Would you like me better if I was?
It's human nature We all feel the same way
And I'm not sorry I have no regrets
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me Just look in the mirror
And I'm not sorry I don't have to justify anything
It's human nature I'm just like you
And I'm not sorry Why should I be?
I'm not your bitch don't hang your shit on me Deal with it
-Madonna, Dave Hall, S. McKenzie, K. McKenzie, and M. Deering
"Human Nature"
Bedtime Stories
©1994 WB Music Corp
Surely whoever speaks to me in the right voice Him or her I shall follow Who needs the sun, when the rain's so full of life Who needs the sky It's here in your arms I want to be buried You are my sanctuary Who needs the sun, when the rain's so full of life Who needs the sky, when the ground's open wide It's here in your arms I want to be buried You are my sanctuary Who needs a smile, when a tear's so full of love Who needs a home, with the stars up above It's here in your heart I want to be carried You are my sanctuary Who needs the light, with the darkness in your eyes Who needs to sleep, with the stars in the sky It's here in your soul I want to be married You are my sanctuary And the earth was void and empty And darkness was upon the face of the earth Is all of this pain so necessary You are my sanctuary Surely whoever speaks to me in the right voice Him or her I shall follow As the water follows the moon, silently Who needs the sun with fluid steps Who needs the sky around the globe Who needs to sleep I hear your voice You are you are my sanctuary You are you are, you are You are my sanctuary you are
-Madonna, Dallas Austin, Anne Preven, Scott Cutler, Herbie Hancoc "Sanctuary" Bedtime Stories ©1994 WB Music Corp
Lyrics pulled from the
Madonna Lyrics Archives
Special thanks to Kenny Zalewski
for running the place.
Well, pretty soon it's going to be back to the asylum for me, and I still have a LOT of work to do, so I'll take a bow, say goodbye, and thanks to everyone else I didn't have time to name, or even mention here. I'll always be in love with you.