I'm going to try to make this one fairly brief, because I want to get outside for a while before the afternoon is over.

A little piece of content by Yanthor has been an inspiration to me today. Tonight, I'm going to finish (by "finish", I mean "write") the essay I've been planning to crank out since early last month.

About my talk that it might take days to write... Who am I kidding? This idea for this essay took one evening to conceive and plan in my head. I would have written it right then, had a pen and paper been readily available. Besides, most of the best A papers I wrote in college were one-nighters. As I recall, even the bulk of the work for my 10+ page research term paper was done during a single weekend, except for items like notecards, which were required earlier. (Fellow ucollege.edu students who were also in my College Writing 2 class might remember that.)

So I think I can crank it out in an evening if I set my mind to it. That's what I will do. Tonight. It's how I work.

And yes, it might just be vaguely related to the topic Yanthor described. (Who was that unnamed person he talked about at the end, anyway? I can't think of who he could possibly be referring to. ;) Anyway, enough building up for that. I'm here to discuss my plans for the future.

Circumstances have changed, and will continue to change. Therefore, I adapt. Here's what I see as some some fairly likely scenarios for the future.

Goal: Get a job ASAP. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I need to move on this with much more commitment than I have done up until now. Will my efforts ultimately make a difference? I don't know, but I'm going to give it my best.

I'm also switching modes from looking for a part time job, to looking for a full time job, largely because I've realized I've decided I would like to remain a residenct of the the state of Colorado for a while. The extended road trip idea, if it ever happens, is going to have to wait until my debts are all paid off. I may take a few vacations in a few months, but "exploring the country" is going to have to wait until later.

My ideal scenario would consist of finding a job which pays me enough to continue to stay in this apartment, and gradually pay off my remaining debt. Again, I don't know if it will happen, but that would certainly be ideal.

I also intend to continue to work on buildmeasite until November. That's how long scottgalvin.com said the position would last, and I intend to work on it until that term is up. Between now and then, I will finish the backend code I started, and get the site builder feature-complete for Site Builder Version 1. (Or whatever the official title turns out to be.)

To this end, I need to be a bit more diligent about putting in the time we agreed to: 20 hours a week. I haven't quite been doing that, largely because my schedule has been such a bunch of unpredictable flim flam. I need to correct that, and get a little more consistent, despite being unemployed. (When I do get employed, I'm going to have to work it in wherever I can.) Besides, since I'm getting paid by the hour, it will also mean I get more of the money I've been planning on. :)

The precise nature of this schedule will be worked out during the coming days.

IF, by the end of September, I have not yet found a job, I will notify the apartment management that I am moving out. It's the only choice, really. If this unfortunate scenario occurs, I will spend the following month, October, getting utilities cancelled and figuring out what to do with all my stuff. I'll probably keep the things which are most important to me in my car, sell what I can, and give or throw away the rest. Maybe my parents would want some of this furniture back. I don't know. I hope that doesn't happen.

If things go this way (and I hope they don't), I may even do something radical, like join Greenpeace. (While keeping in mind that I still have some debt to pay.) Or maybe move to another state where the employment situation is a bit friendlier. (The report I heard on the radio yesterday stated that Colorado is currently the worst in the nation as far as unemployment goes.) In any case, I can't sign a lease that I will be unable to pay. If it means I end up on the street for a while, maybe that is what fate has willed for me.

As has been documented in ancient ramblings archives, it is not possible unilaterally find a job any more than it is possible to unilaterally find a girlfriend. A lot of it depends on luck, and, most importantly, somebody else who is also willing to participate. Without that, even the most dedicated effort will fail. I must accept that there are some things I simply cannot control, even while making the best effort that I can.

Obviously, unless a miracle happens, I don't think I'll be paying off my debts by the year's end. It just isn't feasable.

IF I get a job -- any job -- I will be seeing "her" again. That plan is still intact, though it has been delayed. Even if it means cutting into savings in the short term. The day I get the offer is the day I call to make the appointment.

A few minutes ago, I made a phone call to her number. I left a message saying that some things hadn't turned out the way I had planned, but I still intended to see her one more time if things work out. It won't be quite as soon as I had hoped, and it obviously won't be at the beginning of the September, like I had said last time I talked to her. I'll explain further if she calls back. Communication is the key to life.

These are my plans as they currently stand.

Tonight: Write my essay.

Tomorrow: Re-tume the resume I wrote for a more general purpose. Installfest. A viewing of one of the worst scifi films in history.

Monday: Job hunt in the morning. Buildmeasite in the afternoon. Or maybe vice versa. In any case, I'm going to treat it as an 8-5 work day. Half on the code, half on the job seach. 4 hours each. No BS.

Then, I'll have the evening to relax. Maybe go to meditation class. Hang out in mass irc. Unwind. Keeping some semblence of a routine is good for me.

That's the plan as it currently stands. Now, I'm going to take some paper with me and go outside. Exercise and write.

Welcome to my world.