My sleep cycles once again seem to be going erratic.

My doctor appointment yesterday was rescheduled for next week. Seems the doctor was sick. Heh.

Lately, I've felt myself sinking, and I'm not sure what to do about it.

Last two nights, I've come home from work feeling ridiculously tired; so much so that I went to bed at ~ 19:30. Of course, as always, the problem with that is that one then tends to wake up at around 1:30, roll out of bed and surf the web for a while, return to bed, and then being grudgingly awakened at 0700, feeling as sleepy as ever.

The angst and anger have been returning on and off. I felt really bad about that this morning. (Technically, that's yesterday morning, I suppose.) I don't know what to do with it. Is this irrational? I hate it. I just want to smoosh it all into a little ball (like the tangled knot that sometimes appears in my stomach), hurl it up in one big heave, and eject it out into space. Forever.

Maybe I should try another of those exercises my therapist suggested.

Oh shit. I don't think this is helping. Even as I type, the self destructive urges come on stronger. Sorry I couldn't post something more positive tonight, people. I wanted to. I really, really wanted to.

I'm gonna go back and try to get more sleep. Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll wake up in another universe. Until then...